February 2012
Woman: Can I have birth control?
Government: No.
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
Government: No.
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Government: No.
Woman: Well, why can't I have birth control?
Government: Because. Sex isn't for recreation.
Woman: It can help regulate my period and benefit me in other ways.
Government: Too bad.
Man: For no reason other than for recreational sex, may I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Man: YES, YES I DO!!
Government: WELL HOWDY, VALID CITIZEN. You can buy condoms by the dozens. Here, here's a pack of special condom for "His Pleasure." Oooh, these come in different colours and flavours. Here, try these. They have ribs on them. And this one glows in the dark!! LOL OMG DICK LIGHTSABER!!
Government: But seriously, you're a man. You can do what ever you want.
Woman: But-
Government: Shut up, you sinning, freeloading hussy.
1 tag
On the ME3 multiplayer demo...
antivian:
princesscheesecake:
unidentifiedspoon:
I decided to finally start using voice chat and warned a guy when he was getting snuck up on by a Phantom. Here’s what happened…
“thanks man—oh my god wait you’re a girl”
“holy shit what there are no girls on the internet lol”
“hey will you let me suck your tits”
And just as I was about to disconnect, guess what happens?
“Hello, dears,...
Watchbecontentwithoutperfection:
gmh
GPOY
The 8th gif in your folder is what your soul is...
immichii:
isa-isa-baby:
dancingflurry:
terminallycooking:
chainsawsandfashion:
paststrider:
((My soul is made of Metalocalypse characters? FUCK YEAR))
((……..So…….. MY SOUL IS MADE OF DR WHO FUCK YEAH ))
[[ ….. Well then. ]]
That awkward moment when you try to do something... →
totally-relatable:
(via Totally-Relatable: The funniest relatable posts.)
Police: "Tumblr, you're under arrest."
joyouslyprofane:
youarestuckinmythoughts:
17xinfinity:
russianwater:
gayxmen:
sageoflogic:
miss-lizzifer:
oh-mystarisfading:
Whovians:
Sherlockians:
Potterheads:
homestucks:
shit were escapping to thes side…….,………..
Hetalians:
FMA fandom:
Or alternately:
Bleach Fandom:
or
just me:
MFW:
“Only hang around people that are positive and make you feel good. Anybody who...”
– Amy Poehler (via toomanypeacocks)
“talking about virginity is so annoying to me, and here’s why- firstly it’s used...”
– mutualaddiction responding to an ask saying she was hot because she was a virgin (via babrahamlincoln)
